31 July 2020
There is a saying I like which is “Anything and everything is bound to change from one form to another at some time in the universe. Hence change is the only constant in the universe, besides the eternal universe itself.”
In the same way we are subject to change in one way or another as we grow, being affected as we are by everything around us and how we react to those changes. Sometimes we learn from these changes, though often it takes us time to do so. Sadly some never learn, doing the same things over and over again but expecting different results at some point. That does not occur!
What I have found over the years is to try and learn from my mistakes, to not repeat them (even though that can be difficult at times) and to make those changes, even if it means coping with quite big changes at times.
When I was much younger, attitudes by others towards me and my disabilities meant I had to act so that others did not notice them. For example, finding a different way of tying shoelaces – I found my own way of doing so because my right hand was (and still is) too weak to do the job the way others do. Happily I have found that over time more and more people seem to accept that whilst we may look similar, we are all different. I now find that I am generally treated in a far better way, but that may also be because I behave slightly differently now. I take the time to explain my disabilities and show how I try my best to cope, but equally how I accept there are some things I simply cannot do unaided.
Sadly there are some people I have met who have found it difficult to accept the changes it was necessary for them to make in order to survive. One lady I knew who had cancer almost demanded that the world should change to suit her. A man I knew who was a brilliant musician was advised to lose weight but did not do so, whilst another dear friend ignored the words she was given about changing her life. They were offered choices, given a chance to change their ways in this life but did not do so. As a result their lives on this earth ended earlier than they might otherwise have done.
Even now I am facing further changes in how and where I live, as I am unable to get out and about the way I used to. But what has sustained me in these difficult times, apart from my faith in God, is that I know these changes are what I need for the next chapter in my life. We cannot know in any definite way what tomorrow may bring, but by looking after ourselves, with proper food, with gentle exercise and appropriate relaxation we can not only be helping ourselves but also then be able to help others. There are many forms of exercise, many different foods and many different forms of relaxation. I have found what seems to suit me best, for example I do not eat red meat. I am learning to walk again and have been taught an excellent relaxation therapy which others also find to be of great benefit. As previously said, I shall write more about that later. Suffice it to say for now that for me, this has been a major contributor in coping with this particular life-changing experience.
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Diary of a Care Home Inmate 